Conversation with My Stove

8 01 2012

Summary: New apartment. First use of stove in this apartment. First use of any stove in months.

Conversation I just had with my stove:

—-

Me: You’re making weird noises, what does that mean? Are you on? I guess so, the big coil at the bottom is all red.

Stove:

Me: Ok, it looks like you’re heating up my pizza. How the fuck do I use this timer? Forget it, I’ll just use my phone.

Stove:

Stove: BEEP

Me: Oh god, are you going to blow up? Why would you beep? Did I set a timer by accident or something? Why is the coil getting dimmer?

Stove:

Me: Oh. I’m a tard. You’re pre-heated. To the temperature I set you to. That’s what the beep was for. Now I’m supposed to start cooking my food.

Stove:

Me: I am not good at this game.

—-

I think the stove may have rolled its eyes at me. I don’t really blame it.

Blog-related note: Restaurant reviews to re-commence soon; I haven’t gone entirely insane (yet).

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2 responses

9 01 2012
Diane

Look forward to having you back!

10 02 2012
daddyo

Well, I guess this is why you are not an appliance engineer. Does the stove have any kind of instruction book? Maybe you could see it online. Good luck with that. Home cooking is the best! (healthiest)

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