Brenda’s Beignets

Brenda’s French Soul Food is in the TL. That’s SF-speak for the Tenderloin. Which is the filth-ridden, junkie-laden, pristinely located neighborhood right in the middle of the city between all the other neighborhoods you like (ex: downtown, Hayes Valley, Nob Hill, etc.). The Tenderloin is like San Francisco’s booby trap for visitors who stumble into the area accidentally, and just a puss-filled blemish on the landscape that natives avoid most of the time.

Sunlit Brenda’s

Sometimes something good takes up residence in the TL. Brenda’s is one of these diamonds in the rough, if you will. Last time I took a cab here, my driver was very confused.

Driver: “You want to go where?”

Me: “Polk between Turk and Eddy.”

Driver: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Yes, it’s ok, I’m meeting people there.”

Drivers are overly concerned when I request seemingly perilous destinations, for some reason.

Anyway, Brenda’s is awesome. It’s a decent-sized place and it will have a good SF wait for a table during weekend brunch. They do breakfast, lunch, dinner, and aforementioned weekend brunch. I’ve been for brunch and dinner, and both were very good.

Florentine $10

Fried Catfish $11

For brunch, Alicia and I both ordered a Benedict of sorts. They have four choices of Benedicts, all $10 or $11. Comes with nice potatoes or grits.

The “dinner” I had there was just a mash of appetizers/sides shared between me and my two lady friends. The Brie en Croute salad was amazing. Fried shallots, sweet yummy dressing and a ridiculously good flaky bread-covered piece of warm brie. So good.

Brie en Croute Salad $8.50

Other sides we shared were mac ‘n cheese, hushpuppies, and collared greens, and then a dessert of the (nearly manditory) Beignets and their special of peanut butter mud pie. The mac and puppies were really good, but the collared greens had an unidentified meat product in them which chased off the two veggies at the table. Plus, didn’t really love the taste, oddly. Usually I love any greens.

Mac & Cheese $5

Hushpuppies $4.75

The Beignets are somewhat of a specialty; you get three per order and they’re massive! Choice of plain (no filling), chocolate, or apple. The sampler comes with one of each. Note also that the price of all these goods is relatively cheap, which makes any SF meal exciting. Aside from the location (which actually isn’t too far south of Nob Hill), it’s a great place.

Beignet Flight $6

Peanut Butter Mud Pie

Is it a philosophical commentary on a person’s state of mind through the eyes of their refrigerator? Is it a realization of the social implications of gender roles and family values in the current state of our society? Is it an intermittent and admittedly poor advertising campaign for Trader Joe’s? I dunno, it’s my fridge. And it makes me laugh.

I will be updating sporadically and accepting submissions from other swf’s (and sf’s of any ethnicity, really). Mom, will you do me the honor?

Say that in, like, one of those Dick Tracy Chicago gangster accents to get the full gist of what’s happening in that sentence, y’shee. Capo’s is the newest gig from world champion pizza tosser Tony Gemignani of Tony’s Pizza Napolitana, one of the famous SF pizza joints (also the owner of Pyzano’s in Castro Valley). This time he’s gone old school with Capo’s — red patent leather booths, brick walls, and mood lighting chandeliers. And a specialization in Chicago-style deep dish pizza. I can dig it.

I really liked this place. It’s busy. There’s a very nice, posh bar. The booths are plush as shit. The menu is awesome and a bit quirky for a pizza place. The wait staff is courteous and attentive. The food is fattening and delicious.

What was surprising to me was the portion sizes. They’re immense. Not chic SF style at all. But not unwelcome either, except to my unsuspecting belly. We ordered two appetizers and one 13″ deep dish to share between four people. We asked the waiter if that was enough food and he replied emphatically, “oh yeah”. Which alarmed us a bit. Then they brought unsolicited soup, Banchero’s style. It was welcome and yummy. Then our appetizers came.

Baked artichokes in spinach and provolone cream

The first appetizer to arrive was the baked artichokes. I didn’t really read on the menu where it said “in spinach and provolone cream”, which is mostly what it was. It was basically artichoke dip. I kinda wished they’d just said that on the menu. But it was still delicious. I think it probably took two years off my life, and my arteries were screaming in horror, but I just laughed and ate. Delicious.

Garlic bread with mozzarella… $5.95!!!

Next arrived our garlic bread with mozzarella cheese. Which I thought would be a paltry few slices of lightly-cheesed bread. Cue comically surprised expression. It was more like a whole loaf worth of bread with a pound of cheese on it. It was amazing and ridiculous. And amazingly ridiculous when slathered in the aforementioned artichoke dip. Double heart attack challenge: accepted.

Last, but not least, was our pizza. We ordered the Frank Nitti, though we didn’t get the reference. It was only 13″ diameter, but it weighed as much as a bowling ball. And it felt relatively similar to that in your stomach. I was not terribly hungry when we arrived (idiot). I ate two helpings of soup and our all-carb appetizers. I could not even get through my one slice of five-pound pizza. It was ridiculous. And good. And ridiculous.

Overall, I loved the place. The pizza wasn’t as good as Little Star, imho, but the menu was a good enough rival and the atmosphere was better. Also, Capo’s is like four blocks from my house and Little Star (either one) is way across town. So. I will take some Capo’s anytime.

Side notes: I want to try the thin crust next time. And, if you’re going, they only take cash. Come prepared or use their ATM machine.

The awesome thing about having a food blog in SF is that it’s no longer necessary to write bad reviews of restaurants. There’s just too much good stuff here to waste time on sub-par food. Chaya is one of the best places I’ve been in a while.

It’s mom’s birthday. More than a pony, she wants a nice meal at an upscale restaurant — preferably with a view of the water — and a fun night with her daughters. Choosing a restaurant is always difficult, but we settled on Chaya, though none of us had been there before.

Chaya is on Embarcadero across the street and a bit south from the Ferry Building. It has large windows that look directly out onto the Bay Bridge. The atmosphere is fancy but not pretentious. The menu is amazing.

Our entrance involved unexpectedly squeezing all three of us into one revolving door compartment. The hostess said she’s never seen anyone do that. Well, we’re from Hayward, so, there’s that. We should not be trusted to act normal in public. Thankfully they still served us.

The food is French/Japanese. Weird, right? Literally everything on the menu looked amazing. They have lots of creative seafood dishes, salads, sushi, steaks, and amazing sides. Oddly, there were no mains for strict vegetarians, though there were a few appetizers, sides, and a small sushi section.

Bottles of wine were half off on Sundays, #win. We ordered a sushi roll starter to share, mom and I ordered the same cod dish for dinner, and sister ordered filet mignon. At the recommendation of the waiter, we could not resist sharing the macaroni and cheese side to share as well. There were literally no complaints about anything. It was all amazing.

San Francisco Roll: crab, shrimp (cooked), avocado, cucumber, tomato, asparagus, soy paper

Soy Glazed Local Black Cod: hijiki brown rice, tempura green beans, baby bok choy

Angus Filet Mignon: fingerling potatoes, creamed swiss chard, black truffle sauce

Fontina Macaroni Cheese with white truffle oil

Particularly ridiculously amazing was the creamed chard with the filet and the rice that came with the cod. I could have eaten an entire vat of either. Yeah, I just made something delicate and delicious sound gross. Sorry.

Dessert was chocolate croissant bread pudding for me and sis, a nice port wine for mom.

Chocolate croissant bread pudding with caramel ice cream

Mains are around $30 each, appetizers in the $12-$20 range. The half price bottle of wine saved us $25, and the whole endeavor was appropriately priced for the quality of the experience. Certainly not an every-week affair, but completely perfect for a special occasion. Ten stars.

Yeay, food!

There aren’t actually a lot of veg options on the menu, unfortunately, but I found something out the second time I went: they’ll make non-veg things veg if you ask. Because they’re chefs and that shiz doesn’t phase them. I love this city.

This is the beet salad. I thought it would be mostly beets. But it wasn’t. It was better than that. Cuz the corner store doesn’t mess around. Not even with beets.

Roasted Beets (salad)

This is the smoked salmon with rye flatbread and dill creme fraiche (hold the pastrami gastrique, whatever that is). It was yummmm.

Smoked salmon

And this is the veg dish du jour (or du mois, as it were) which was some sort of grains with mushrooms and cheese. I don’t recall the exact description, but it sounded like it would be risotto-esque, and it was except that the grains were less tender and more distinct in form. It was really good.

Grains and mushrooms and sauce, oh my!

My second trip was for a blogger event hosted by Urbanspoon. Which meant they paid for a variety of dishes to be brought out to about fifteen local bloggers hungry for photos as much as for food. It was awesome; I love free food. Highlights:

Starting with the best first: this is a new kale concoction that’s not currently on the menu. They asked for our recommendations regarding the dish’s introduction to the menu. My thoughts: YES PLEASE. The kale was deep fried, crispy and likely bereft of any nutritional value it once held. It was amazing. Those balls perched on top? Panko-crusted, deep-fried poached egg. Yes, the chef somehow managed to deep fry a poached egg and keep the inside runny. He described the process to us (yeah, we got an exclusive with the chef and owner, no big): amazing.

Kale ‘n stuff

This is the “Corner Store PB&J”, an odd dish that I normally would have nothing to do with as it’s covered in bourbon-glazed pork. But, being the kitchen-savvy folk they are, they brought out a veggie version with mushrooms instead of pork. Mushrooms over a grit cake with huckleberry as the “J”. Ridiculous. Incredible.

PB&J: The real thing with pork

I single-handedly destroyed the veggie version. And I’d do it again.

And I learned something that night: “sweetbreads” are not in fact bread. Indeed they’ve gone the opposite direction as “offal” and made a confusingly appetizing name. Regardless, everyone said they tasted like chicken wings.

Sweetbreads. Don’t ask.

We were even presented the Idaho Red Trout dish, along with a handful of other salads and mains to feast on. It was a pretty amazing night.

Trout in the house

Oh! And listen to this: their Pickled Paloma cocktail consists of tequila, lime, pickle brine, and house grapefruit soda. Yeah, it’s a cocktail that tastes like a pickle. It was amazing. Note: three is too many. Even if they’re free. Enjoy.

I was invited to the grand opening of Nespresso’s newest flagship boutique in Union Square in SF a few months ago. When I showed up, the place was still sorely under construction. I later found out that I was somehow not on the list when they told everyone about the cancellation of the event. I was sad. They sent me a $200 Nespresso machine and probably another $50 worth of accompanying paraphernalia. Apology accepted.

My very own Nespresso U machine

I recently went to the real Grand Opening Event which went quite a bit better than the first one. Indeed, it was most certainly one of the best media events I’ve yet experienced. Let’s discuss.

The sched:

5.30 – 6.30: Press Preview & Executive Remarks

6.30 – 9pm: Evening Event

Based on this description, I had no idea what to expect. I had no idea that there would literally be a red carpet out front. That they would be renting a cable car (the kind on wheels) decorated in Nespresso banners to be parked out front of the store as a photo op spot and gift bag storage location. That they would have wine, roving photographers and videographers, demonstrations, and a huge spread of food. I was woefully unprepared and pleasantly surprised all at once.

Upon check-in at the red carpet, I received a pre-printed, magnetic, uber-plush name tag. There were only a handful of them; the “Press Preview” was apparently relatively exclusive. The woman informed me that I should come by to receive my gift bag at the end, and to fill out this form to receive my very own Nespresso machine. My first mistake: painfully detrimental honesty. “Oh, I already have a Nespresso machine! You guys sent me one.” Smart, Angie, very smart. You can’t just accept a free thing and give it to one of your deserving friends? No, your first instinct is to be honest, barring all consequences. Like an idiot. Good work. Empty handed, I proceeded into the boutique for the event.

Do excuse this exquisitely awful photo, I let my phone do the photographs this time. Never again.

As I walk thorough the front doors, a series of waiters holding trays awaits to my left. I take a champagne flute from one tray, the next server pours a bit of raspberry liquor in the flute, the next champagne. The final server puts a finishing raspberry in my glass, and now I have a super fancy cocktail served by no less than four people. There are more employees and PR people than guests. I would estimate there were probably 30 staff total in a room the size of about two large Starbucks cafes. It was ridiculous.

The staff were all dressed up. Hair, makeup, ties. Nametags. Smiles. They would approach me and offer to show me things. “Shall we step downstairs to the boutique? Our President will give you a tour of the store.” Except they most certainly had a fancier name for the store, I just don’t remember it. They had flown in Nespresso higher-ups from Switzerland and a PR team from New York for this event. I received a private tour of the extremely swanky purchasing room from the President of Nespresso USA. In showing me how the place worked (super techy-rad — self-refilling shelving, check out stands that automatically detect what items are in your bag, super speedy digital self-check out), he let me pick out a half dozen boxes of Nespresso capsules which he then bought for me and let me take. It was kind of amazing.

High-tech self check out area at the Nespresso SF boutique

There were then three short speeches by the president, head of marketing, and the president of the America’s Cup, of which Nespresso is a sponsor this year, followed by a few brief and unintentionally fumbly tours of the products. I had been there for an hour thus far and was already pretty overwhelmed.

Then it was time for the real party to start; 300 people were expected for the “Evening Event”. People started pouring in the front door. Everyone is dressed to the nines. There is complimentary valet. I feel like I’m at some sort of movie screening. I’m wearing slip-on shoes and my North Face fleece; I came straight from work. And I have no one to talk to because I had a bit of a plus-one snafu. So I started to feel kinda awkward. And hungry.

The food was coming out, but it was getting so crowded that I couldn’t move anywhere. I wished I had been better prepared (dressed nicer, brought friends, had somewhere to put my jacket, handbag, and Nespresso bag), and decided to head toward my gift bag instead. Since I was leaving as most people were arriving, I had to ask about the gift bag, which is always a classy move. “Can I have my free things now? Remember, I’m the one who turned down the free machine, but now wants other free things. Gimme!”

The newest Nespresso machine, debuting in the US later this year. Yeah, we got a preview.

I was given a gift bag that literally came up to mid-thigh if you set it on the ground. It wasn’t full or anything, it was just giant. I suppose they expected me to stow it gracefully in the ample trunk of my valeted vehicle. They likely did not expect me to be walking 25 minutes home with it in tow, trying hard not to let it scrape on the ground the whole way. Why do I seem to always have the privilege of feeling like a goon even when things are supposed to be nice?

Regardless, the event was relatively amazing. It was well-executed, professionally done, and totally gave off the high-end, fancy swank vibe they were going for. And all the people who looked totally prepared for it seemed to be having a great time. The only thing I want from that event is a do-over.

Either way, now we can have a Nespresso party at my place. I have all the flavors. Booya.

“Stacks.”

Excellent. One question, one answer. No fuss. No reservation. It was a Monday (New Year’s Eve), so none of the hip brunch-y places in North Beach near my place were going to be open. And, apparently, my knowledge of City breakfast places outside my brunch neighborhood is slim. So, Stacks it was.

Bloody Mary with bacon. Mother was pleased.

Stacks is bigger than your average SF restaurant. Which means the turnover is greater. Which seems to mean the wait is less. Booya. After 15 minutes, free coffee outside the front door, and one oddly-timed power outage (I think it was just a flipped breaker), we were seated in the lushly decorated establishment right in the heart of super cute Hayes Valley. There was even (metered) street parking. Imagine such bliss.

The menu is immense. It’s like a Cheesecake Factory but not shitty. Crepes. Omelettes. Scrambles. Pancakes. Waffles. Fritattas. They even had lunch available as well: sandwiches, salads, burgers, panini, savory* crepes. The selection is intense. And the food does not disappoint. Also, the hash-brown-ish potatoes are amazing.

Behold, food:

Eggs Louis. Like an Eggs Benedict except with crab instead of ham. Yummmm.

Chorizo Scramble for Mom. Mom loves scrambles.

Sister had a Mighty Meat Crepe. Mom voted it the winner of the three of our dishes. I did not try it.

Also, their mimosas look like this, which is adorable:

Mimosa!

And lastly, all the miscellaneous stuff on our table looked like this, and I liked it:

Stuff on table!

*My mom does not understand the definition of the word “savory”, with respect to food. I have described it as “not sweet” or perhaps “salty”, and used examples such as a “ham and cheese crepe”. The internet did not readily help with an all-inclusive definition (via a 30 second Google search). If you have any thoughts, please do comment.

Colombian Feast

Item 1: Arepas

This is Natalia’s specialty. She’s made them for us before and they’re fun and yummy. Have you had a pupusa? It’s like that. A small, corn flour patty that is pan grilled (the way Natalia makes them) and then eaten by cutting in half and stuffing with veggies, cheese, and/or meats like a pita.

Arepas fresh out of the pan

Natalia made “sweaty chicken” (don’t ask me, I don’t eat chicken), mushrooms, grilled peppers and onions, corn with string cheese*, with guac and a butternut squash/sun-dried tomato/goat cheese spread. It was all really, really good.

Item 2: Cheese Balls (aka bunuelos)

These little gems are deep fried balls of corn flour, egg, and grated queso fresco. Nick (Natalia’s husband) describes them as cheese donuts, which is relatively accurate. They’re fluffy and delicious. Mmmm… fried things.

Bunuelos = cheesy donut balls

Item 3: Fried Plantains

This dish is genius. I did not take enough photos, but read the directions carefully; it’s so easy and they’re so good:

1. Take unripe plantain (the greener the better), peel, and slice into about 2″ long pieces. 
2. Place plantain pieces in boiling pan of oil until they’re cooked all the way through. This will take maybe 15 minutes or so.
3. Take the plantains out of the oil and while still hot, mash each slice into a flat piece with a couple rolls of a rolling pin (or coffee mug). Don’t roll so much that they fall apart.
4. Set aside to cool. Don’t stack them ‘cuz they’ll stick together. Also, put some salt on them.
5. Using that same pan of oil, fry the flattened plantain slices until they’re golden brown.
6. Take them out and serve to your friends. Accept compliments.

Plantain slices fried once and squashed, ready for the second frying

These are SO GOOD. They are good by themselves, or with a splash of goat cheese, or covered in guac, or with all the same fixins as were on your arepa. Amazing. And easy, too.

So that was our New Year Colombian feast. Not a bad way to end 2012. Happy 2013!! Also, this was us after we were fed and happy:

Happy feasters. Or, Mala and her friends. Chef Natalia is on the left.

*Corn with string cheese. By far the most unsuspecting part of the meal. It was amazing. Cut corn off the cob, put it in a pan with some butter. Then slowly stir in an egg so that it coats all the corn and stays light and fluffy. Then string some string cheese and melt that in with the corn. Ridiculously good.

Here’s an excerpt:

4,329 films were submitted to the 2012 Cannes Film Festival. This blog had 15,000 views in 2012. If each view were a film, this blog would power 3 Film Festivals

Click here to see the complete report.

Hi, thank you for coming to my website. I hope you get a moment to look around before racing to my contact page and immediately emailing me about events and products that may only be mildly relevant, if at all, to my blog topic. I will try to respond, but only because I’m sort of anal-retentive about responding to emails. I will probably say no thank you politely. For those of you in the food and restaurant industry, thank you for your email; I really appreciate the invitation to your event, tasting, or product trial. You guys rock. Now, listen up.

You’re having a media event. For one reason or another, you’ve invited me! Yeay! I have no idea what to expect from this invite. I will probably ask you. Can I bring a guest? Will there be food suitable for a pescatarian? I won’t ask the 589 other questions that my over-planner brain has thought of, but I will decide whether to go or not. And if I’m very very lucky, your event will be like the Thorny Rose bowling night a few weeks ago. And then I might even blog about it. I present my case:

Exhibit #1: The invite to the Thorny Rose event:

Thorny Rose Event Invite

This invite is rad. Look at the fonts! Aren’t they fun? Read the content. Cheesy puns, Instagram-esque pictures, reference to The Big Lebowski. I mean, I suppose this is really a marketing lesson in catering to your audience, but dang, well done. Also, I love bowling. And The Big Lebowski. And I don’t even hate wine anymore. And they said I could bring a plus one (they even said “or two”!), which makes most media events wayyyy less awkward. Rad.

Exhibit #2: The event:

Look at everyone having fun!

They rented the entire Mission Bowl facility. Private party, biatches! My name wasn’t on the list for some reason, but someone who seemed important waved me in after asking me my blog name. I’m sure they had no idea who I was, but since I knew to give a blog name, they probably knew I was invited. So I felt vindicated and welcome. Good move TR.

Exhibits #3-12: Free wine at the bar. In rad custom plastic cups a la Wine Lands. And free bowling. And t-shirt prizes if you got a strike (I got FIVE — yeah, I was in excellent form). And roving appetizer attendants. And a necklace making station. And silly props to use for the photos that the prof photog was taking of you while you had an awesome time. And Jenga and other board games at the tables. And the Creme Brulee cart — yes, they rented the Creme Brulee Cart — for your personally crafted dessert enjoyment. Do you see how this was successful?

Also, they happened to take this awesome pic of my +1, Ms. Smalls. Look at that form!

In conclusion, this was obviously the Best Media Event Ever. I mean, maybe these rad events happen all the time and I’m just not invited. Fair enough. Either way, this was pretty much perfection. And then they followed up by sending out the professional pics, and even sent me a free bottle of wine. Nicest. People. Ever. Thank you Thorny Rose, you really know how to show a girl a good time. I would go on a second date with you, fo sho. Everyone else: take note. And don’t forget to invite me.

Sincerely,

~broccoli and chocolate~